You are sharing your dream with your partner. In that conversation, spend just as much time listening to and understanding THEIR dreams. Only then will you be ready to build something together. If the goal of the conversation is to get them to hop on board YOUR train, then you'll be taking that trip alone. Put aside the assumption that your plan is the best plan. Have an "Our Dreams" conversation. Then build the path to the future you both want. Maybe it's ETA. Maybe it's something else. But they can't join you if you already have no room for them.

The Gottmans have great resources on these conversations. I know you thought this was about ETA, but check out "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work." It goes over how to surpass gridlock by truly listening to each other's dreams. Also, remember that no podcast, book, or pal is going to be able to tell you what your partner values, wants, or needs to feel included, loved, and respected. You're going to have to ask them directly.